Dragons, Pontiffs and Pilatus

Ali –Pilatus Kulm sits 7000 feet above Luzern and takes the self-described slow Swiss hiker 5 hours to ascend (bear in mind that the Swiss also will tell you they know only a little English and then proceed to conjugate a rare English verb). We opted for the less exhausting Golden Round Trip, which starts in Luzern on a boat to Alpnachstad, ascends the mountain in the world’s steepest cogwheel railway, then descends on the other side first in a aerial cableway and then in a gondola (the difference between the two being only in the size of the sardine can you are stuffed into).

Now according to legend, Pilatus is the home of both a dragon with healing powers and also the soul of Roman Prefect, Pontius Pilate, who apparently is super cranky when disturbed.

Since we opted for the tourist experience rather than the Swiss 5 hour ascent on a holiday weekend no less, we were not exactly alone on this journey. So on the boat ride over we strategized on how to avoid the massive line at the cog train. Joe and I each covered an exit on the boat as we approached Luzern. My door was the lucky winner and, as soon as the gang plank was in place, I elbowed a couple children and a Japanese tour group aside to make a mad dash for the cog train line. Those small children I trampled will eventually forget their trauma but I will never forget getting the last seats on this wild 48% vertical climb.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Once we got to the top, which has two completely unaffordable hotels, a couple short hikes to panoramic outlooks and the requisite souvenir shop, it became fairly easy to believe that both dragons and Pontiff souls might make this a summer residence.


Unfortunately, either we disturbed cranky Pilatus or Joe is allergic to dragons (which I think are distantly related to cats) as he began suffering the first of two epic allergy episodes. I captured the between episode facial swelling.

After a climb through the dragon cave, which was woefully short of dragons and way too populated with tourists and what looked like mountain rabbit poop, we headed to the “dragon ride” aka aerial tram.
The tram let off at Fräkmütegg, a mere 4700 feet up, where you can partake in Switzerland’s longest metal toboggan run and the Pilatus rope park. We, of course, had to do both. I regret to inform you no pictures were taken of either as phone/cameras were not allowed on the toboggan (something about needing your hands for braking which is pure rubbish because why would you brake??) and phones/cameras were not so practical to be holding while clinging to a safety line 40 feet off the ground while distracted by someone crying and praying behind you – feel free to guess whether it was Joe or Maya or both. Of the two, the rope course was the better buy as the toboggan queuing system was clearly designed by Italians or Greeks or Disneyland and not the Swiss. The inefficiency was a big buzz kill and we abandoned the extra 5 rides we had purchased, as none of us could stomach waiting in the line again.

When the ropes course closed at 5 pm we headed to another long line for the gondola down. True to our now 3 week Swiss experience, we met a family of Americans and a lovely guy from Geneva in the line. The Geneva guy told us about a vertical glass lift on the side of another mountain (sounded like he said Mt Birkenstock) that was Hugh Heffner old and still…errrr…lifting despite. So clearly that’s on our list of must-dos. The American family from DC was on a European tour and Maya joined them for the gondola ride down. By the time we made bottom, we heard she had told them her life story, discussed the joys and heartaches of international travel and debated the merits of foreign language acquisition. Yup. Politician or lawyer? What do you think?

Another trip to the Swimmbad, another foreign friend for Maya

If you are a single American girl in the ten-year old age bracket, might I suggest any of Zurich’s many swimming areas as a great place to meet friends.

After a leisurely trip from the river out onto the lake in a howlowcanyougo river boat (that’s not a drawbridge ahead of us), we spent yet another day at the Swimmbad. What was meant to be a quick dip turned into an all day affair after Maya befriended two lovely Dutch sisters, age 10 and 6. The girls were visiting their Spanish cousin who lives here (he’s a banker, as you had assumed, no doubt). 

The girls swam for hours, played volleyball, and ate slushies to their heart’s content. As a bonus, I got to play ping pong as well!

We ended the day with a BBQ before taking the tram back into town…we had long since missed the last boat of the day.

Buttermondsichelfettmacher zum Frühstück.

Joe: What’s a buttermondsichelfettmacher? Why it is both Ali’s first newly coined German word and what we’ve been eating for breakfast every morning, of course. Much more descriptive than croissant, wouldn’t you say?

Don’t worry, we are also eating a lot of fruit. On the table this morning were blackberries, fresh currents, and a 20 Swiss Frank bunch of delicious cherries from the farmers market. I almost fainted when the fruit seller told us how much the cherries cost. Ali rolled her eyes at me and said “when in Zürich…”, which I translated roughly as “you cheapskate!”

The wet and well-regulated Swiss 

Ali – The subject of the schwimmbad was touched on in an earlier post but I don’t think we have quite done it justice. Bad means bathroom and so schwimmbad would seem to translate to ‘peeing while swimming’ but actually is what southerners would call a ‘swimming hole’ and what Baltimoreans would call ‘the place where I got hepititis’. The Swiss, being a culture that evolved living on lakes, are very attached to their swimming holes, which come in a number of flavors: the regular lakeside schwimmbad, the flussbad (or schwimmbad on a river) and even the sportbad, which sounds like some kind of competitive bathing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

During my trip to Zurich last October, some Swiss dinner companions suggested we go to the nude schwimmbad, and then debated among themselves whether Americans could handle the nude schwimmbad given our strange cultural nudity aversion. I’m still not sure if they were pulling my leg as the only nude Swiss I have seen thus far was the 3 year old boy with his swim trunks  around his ankles at the water park after a particularly toilet flush-like water slide ride.

So far our favorite is the flussbad for both its free entry (the sum total count of free things in Zurich so far is 2: flussbad and bike rentals) and water park ride-like quality. The thing that’s truly amazing for a city-dwelling American is the pristine and potable quality of the lakes and rivers that sit smack dab in the middle of a bustling city. I attribute this mostly to the fact that the Swiss are rule following sticklers. Where Americans feel it is our God-given right to throw our trash in the water and wouldn’t dream of inflicting job-killing regulation on our toxin-spewing industry, the Swiss would melt into a formless jelly without regulations and restrictions on their daily living. They dance with Bacchanalian delight while they carefully separate their cardboard recycling from their white paper recycling and package it in uniform neat cubes. It truly is a sight to behold.

The fact that they live their lives in the shadow of immense mountain ranges might also contribute to this rule-following culture. One needs a bit of structure and cultural uniformity to keep from feeling so insignificant and meaningless next to such imposing grandeur.
I have to say that the wall of recycling at the grocery store is a price I’m willing to pay to not swim in poo, toxic sludge and discarded packaging. Regulation never looked so refreshing!

 

We are complete and connected.

Joe – I’m happy to report that, two weeks into our adventure, we have just today received both the remaining boxes that we had shipped prior to our departure and our Internet hardware. To you, these pictures are hardcore boring, but to us they represent a real improvement in our day-to-day.

Skype, FaceTime, Hangouts, and uploading blog posts with pictures just got a whole lot easier. Oh yeah, and working from home as well…

An active city, Zurich

Joe – For those that aren’t driving around in Italian sports cars, Zurich has plenty of other transportation options. The trains, buses, and streetcars can take one pretty much anywhere one wants to go. But it seems that most people walk, bike, skate, or scooter themselves from place to place. Even the dogs are on wheels.

We got a couple of scooters, and have easy access to bikes.

We have also been walking a ton. 12,000 – 22,000 steps a day. And, for the first time in a long time, I went for a run. This was my view of the city at the start of a nice trail that Ali found.